Fairmont Toastmasters Club

[Maria Pablo]

“You will never know the importance of one thing until it is gone.” It is an old cliché, to be sure, but it is true nonetheless.

Madame Toastmaster, fellow toastmasters and guests – It was mid-August last year, my mother was on a hospital bed in the Philippines waiting for her doctor’s discharge order. For quite sometime then, she was diagnosed with hemolithic anemia requiring blood transfusion on a regular basis. Over the phone, towards the end of our conversation, in tears I told my mother, “Mommy, I love you. Be strong. Take care of yourself”. She said I love you back and she was in tears as well. That was our last conversation. It had been 5 years since we saw each other last.

Two weeks later, she died of multiple organ failure due to dehydration from diarrhea. A very tragic loss for me and I continually miss her. I was just used to having her around even if she’s thousands of miles away. We would talk for hours on the phone. She was my comfort, my conscience, my guidance.

This speech is actually late. I could have delivered this last week when we had Mothers as our theme. But I was late in applying for the role.

Today is my father’s birthday and I just mailed my card last week. It won’t get to the Philippines until another week. Had my mom been alive, she would have reminded of these 2 things way ahead of time as she hated being late. Time and again, she would emphasize the virtue of punctuality. “Never be late... It is a sign of disrespect. It’s a loss to you and it is a loss to others as well.” She would always say. Of course she is right. She is almost always right. Isn’t it that Mother knows best?

To illustrate, I was 12 when my mom wanted me to attend a secretarial course in the summer. I protested as I didn’t want to miss all the fun and excitement of summer. But then she said, “Make something out of your summer by learning new skills. You will learn how to type, how to do shorthand. You will benefit from it, you’ll see – probably not now, but later.” So one day I went to the school which was 1 minute away from where we lived. Outside the admissions office was a board on a wall, listing all the admission requirement. As soon as I read the first requirement, I turned around and walked my way home with a big grin on my face. My mom was surprised to see me home so quickly so she asked “What happened? Have you registered?” And I said, “You have a to be a high school graduate. Then my mom asked, “Is that so? But diid you Mrs. Ruiz?” And I said, “Mrs. Who? Who’s Mrs. Ruiz?” She then said, “Oh, never mind. I will just call her. ” So one phone call and two months later, I was a proficient typist. Thanks to Mrs. Ruiz, who happened to be my teacher, who happened to be the school owner and who happened to be a friend of my mother. So you see, not only that mother knows best but they know the best people as well.

Eventually, I capitalized on my typing skills by accepting typing jobs. In college, I was even exempt in my typing class- so while my classmates were learning how to type – asdf jkl; -- I would be in theatres checking out the latest movie. Thanks to my mom, I got hired by CP as data entry clerk in 1999. My temp agency recommended me to CP because of my great typing skills.

I’m sure glad I listed to my mom. Looking back however, how I wish I should have listened to her more.

I have always wondered why my mom kept on pushing me to do things to the point it got it got annoying. But now I realized that she wasn’t pushing – SHE WAS ENCOURAGING ME – SHE WAS ENCOURAGING ME TO DO THINGS THAT WILL HELP ME BECOME A BETTER PERSON. Mothers want their children to become the best that they can be.

For instance, I have always been interested in elocution even in high school. My mother urged me to join Toastmasters back home. I reacted as I thought I was too young to join the club and the thought of being with people who are at least 20 years my senior was just intimidating. I even remember snapping at her “Why do you want me to join, why don’t you join?” Today, I am a member because of that conversation I had with her 2 decades ago. I should have listened to her then and I could have earlier reaped the benefits of being a Toastmaster member.

Another instance, my mother was very skilled in arts and crafts. She taught me a lot but she wanted me specifically to learn crochet pointing out the wonderful things you could create with crochet. But I would always say either “Mom, I’m sleepy.” Or “ Mom, I am too busy. I don’t have time. I have more important things to do.” Now, I could probably find time, but now she is gone. And that’s just my loss.

You won’t appreciate your mother until you become one. As now I could relate with all the pain, all the hardships and all the sacrifices that she went through when she raised my siblings and me …and I have just been a mother for only 8 years.

To all of you fellow toastmasters, I am not aware of your personal circumstances, but this I must say, tell your mother or your father for that mother, that you love them whenever you have the chance, as you will never know when will be the last.